Through the Storm Through this raging storm I tread And as I come passing through I see now what my heart has seen That on the other side is you... You helped me cross the deepest tide No matter where it should lead You gave to me your heart and soul You always offer what I need This storm will now be quieted By your tender loving care I know the reason I came this far It's your love that brought me here Through the storm and highest tide The worst has come and gone For I know I would not be this far Had you not been along Thank you my love for being here For encouraging me to win For I shall now be here for you When your raging storms begin ©2006 Janie Johnson Wrote and Dedicated to Smoke (Kathalise) and Jason I met Smoke through an online group called Friend 2 Friend. I didn't really talk to Smoke all the much, we were always friendly to one another. The more time I spent in F2F the more I learned about Smoke. I learned that Smoke was fighting cancer and had been for quite sometime, along with her Husband Jason, who was at the time and hopefully still is, in remission. One of my fave things, was a column that Smoke did for Friend 2 Friend called Smoke Signals. I found myself looking foward to every month, and the next issue of Smoke Signals. She wrote true life, those things that come from the heart...Smoke, to me, was a hero...I mean she endured everything with strength, courage, and wisdom she would just go from one day to the next, one step at a time. I could never imagine what kind of pain suffering she endured, but I am very proud to be able to call her a friend. Friend 2 friend will not be the same, nor will my life, without the presence of Smoke among us. She will be missed by many, and she will never be forgotten, and anytime we want to feel her presence, we just look for the Smoke Signals. If you would like to go view Smokes website then please do visit Kathalise's Corner. Sign the guestbook so that Smokes family knew that you came for a visit. Thanks. Here are some pages that I have made for Smoke throughout our time spent in Friend 2 friend. A Thinking of you page A Page made for Jason, Smokes Hubby In Appreciation of Smoke Happy Birthday Smoke I saved the Smoke Signals article that Smoke wrote for July. It touched me, so I wanted to share that with all my visitors. We all woke to the sound of thunder; how far off I sat and wondered. It was July of 2006. The doors had been closed and locked with one little portal left called Chat. The rooms were bare of PSP, Friends helping Friends, and Critters galore. We all strained to see around each other to see what the note said posted on the door. With an audible sigh we realized it said "F2F" Closed. We gasped, couldn't believe it. It was as if a tornado was coming and all told to run. We picked up our little bags of memories and jokes and headed for the street. Gone, just like that F2F gone. They say perhaps we'll be back in a few months but as you all know the saying "You can never go home again." Kathy and Donna have done a wonderful job of keeping us all together and trying to fit the right person in the right slot so that the show moves on it's on. They have busted thier asses trying to make this thing a success. And has it been? YES it has or we wouldn't still have huge groups of people jumping in to chat and get to know each other better. We have found friends for life here and support, love, compassion and nurturing. We have found humor, sadness, grief, jokes, interesting life styles and occupations. We have laughed at each others jokes, made fun of our pictures and ohhed and ahhhed over our pets and grandchldren. We have talked on the phone to each other to help us fix our problems and we have stayed up half the night playing games ( Kathy is just nervous that's all when I karate her with my little Japanese girl fighting doll). I have never been treated so special by a group of people from flowers, to necklaces, to afghan Sarah made me to cards and pictures Donna sent me. I have recieved cards from all over the World and met people through a computer that I would never have known. This has been an experience like no other and I will remember it and you all always. I hope that someday F2F comes back and I am here to see it, nothing would make me happier. Donna you and Kathy are the best and thank you for always helping us out and keeping us straight and I know that this is one of the best groups to ever be on the net. I will miss it. I'll stay as long as my health allows me and then when I kick the bucket you all get together and throw a big hoop ta ra. I'll be there you may not see me but in the corner there will be a wisp of smoke that has a faint memory to it and you will know that the SMOKE SIGNAL'S lives on. We will miss you Smoke, we will always know you are around, and we will always feel your presence on this earth. Here is a poem wrote by Smoke NO DESIRE TO STAY The pain has come as I feared it would Not so bad it can't be stood But pain is there to remind me That another year I will not see The blistering ache between my lungs tells me at last it has begun The pain of wakefulness till 5 a.m. When too many pills take command I have been blessed this I know to go 4 years with out an ache And live my life as I usually take But I can feel the strain begin I ask God for Mercy from him to keep it light and very dim to not let me end up a ghost that scares my grandchildren the most I look out the window at the sunset Wondering how many more I'll get That's why we should enjoy each one We never know when for us there done The bitter feelings buried deep inside I refuse to give up my pride I may not make it very long But they will say "she went out strong" The nights are worst as they are so dark and I sit by the window doing my part I cry and I ask God to give me a chance Not to let this be my last dance I look at my family and realize that what I see are tears in their eyes They try to stay strong to protect me But I don't know why they can't see I'm going one way or the other To join my mom, dad and brother I will be missed this I know for there are so many who love me so So if this should be the last thing I write Know that I did put up quite a fight I didn't give up that's not my way I just had nodesire to stay © ~Kathalise~ June 27, 2006 If Tears Could Build A Stairway If tears could build a stairway And memories were a lane We would walk right up to Heaven And bring you back again No farewell words were spoken No time to say goodbye You were gone before we knew it And only God knows why Our hearts still ache in sadness And secret tears still flow What it meant to lose you No one will ever know But know we know you want us To mourn for you no more To remember all the happy times Life still has much in store Since you'll never be forgotten We pledge to you today A hallowed place within our hearts Is where you'll always stay Author Unknown This plaque made by Kathy. ~In Memory of Smoke~ This Page Made for Kathalise, AKA Smoke, By Janie, on behalf of Smokes Family and Friends All content and graphics © Janie Johnson & Heart N Soul Please do not by any means, copy anything from this page Unless given express written consent. Thanks! We will always remember you Smoke!